I don't actually really like beautiful woman. Jealousy? you might says that.... why? Because growing up with beautiful sister, makes me so self-conscious,.. low self esteemed to the max. It's a love-hate, envy-proud relationship,  Arghhh!!

If you think I should not feel like this, it's not healthy, blablabla.. , just  see my sister. standing beside her, makes me just like  a shadow..  it's like we are not related at ALL! I hate this stupid complex genetic heritage for making me feel miserably ugly grr...

My mum said, she starts getting love letter from when she was in standard 5, primary school.  While My memories of growing up is full with delivering love message to my sis , since I was in a primary school year 1!

So imagine, how i feel through out my whole life? The envy feeling that pile up and the self esteem of mine feel like being hit by rocks, down and down..   No, I not complaining  instead Sis, I love you, feel proud ,, you the best sister in d world.. but ... Men!! Y you only chase beautiful woman? Y, making us other normal looking feeling more ugly? Y!!

" The first thing men saw me, they always says I'm beautiful, that's the first thing that they noticed. I'm so tired hearing frustrated. "   -her says on the bad days of  her relationship 

Well,  this girl never been praised like that...


Latest me a week before my sister solemnization day.. no stress?

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